It’s Monday and we’re all probably trying to shake off the woes of another weekend slipping through our grasps.  For some of us, Sunday was a blur and we have the headaches to prove it.  Others of us had a dull weekend filled with duties and chores.  Yet others had a hodgepodge and just want to kick the Monday blues.

Time for a Handie

One day to help a guy get over the dreaded “Mondays” is to not let something slip through your grasp.  That’s right, today we’re talking about the woefully underrated, and seldom enjoyed hand job.

Some of you may find that a boring idea, but let me stop you there.  An average guy has been the recipient of hundreds, if not thousands (depending on his sex drive), of self administered hand jobs. Guys KNOW hand jobs. They like them. If you can administer one properly, he’ll be seriously impressed!

But a partner giving a hand job has many options available that aren’t when the guy is flying solo.  Let’s look at the options.

Option 1 – Old Reliable

Sometimes simple is best. There isn’t a swinging dick on the planet who will deny that a good old fashioned monkey-spank produces good results. If you’re new to the hand job, a good stroking is a great place to start.

Details: This one really is simple.  All you have to do is get a suitable grip and start to stroke up and down the shaft. The results will be exactly what your partner wants.

Manufacturer’s Notes: You can spice this one up by showing the boys some love.  Lift the shaft out of your way and have at them with some oral affection.  You’ll hear the groans and grunts of happiness if you’re doing it right.

Option 2 – The Herky Jerk

Edging is something many guys enjoy.  Basically, the idea is to get right to the point of orgasm and to stop, cool down and then repeat.  When it’s time to blow, the reaction is volcanic.  An edged orgasm is one of the most intense a person can have.

Recommended for the Herky Jerk

Details: This one requires a lighter touch and you’re going to need time.  Want a quickie?  If so, forget The Herky Jerk.  You have to spend time building up the heat and then letting it dissipate.  A good lube is perfect for The Herky Jerk, like the one we recommend here.

Manufacturer’s Notes: You’re absolutely going to have to communicate well to “pull off” a Herky Jerk.  You have to know when he’s close, so that you can ease the pressure.  This is a great time to kiss and get some reciprocation!

Option 3 – The Kiss of Little Death

The French have long referred to orgasm as the “little death.”  Sounds kind of depressing, unless you think of the rush and concluding temporary exhaustion, which then makes the phrase more sensible. But you can make the little death a little more bearable with a few oral pleasures added in.

Details: This is a classic hand job with a light touch of oral (EMPHASIS: LIGHT) pleasuring added in.  You can use a flavored oral sex lube to add to your pleasure while giving him his. The key is to tease the glans (head) of the penis as you gently caress the shaft.  Doing this over and over again in little teases throughout will drive him wild.

Manufacturer’s Notes: You could end up with more than a mouthful using this technique.  Usually the orgasm comes on very rapidly because of the multiple stimulation techniques. If you’re in a safe relationship and ok with that, enjoy!  If not, watch carefully for your partner’s expressions and have him communicate so that you know when it’s coming – literally.

Option 4 – The Double Fister

If you’re in a relationship with a partner who has a little extra artillery range (very well endowed), this is an option that will fire his gun. Two are usually better than one, and this is no exception.

Details: You’ll need a little coordination for this one.  Get both hands on the shaft with the appropriate grip and stroke them with synchronized movement.  You’ll know you’re off sync by his screams (if you go without lube), so try to keep things together.

Manufaturer’s Notes: Make sure your grip is the same on both hands, to keep the pressure constant. With this one, you can also switch hands off to give yourself a break.

The most important aspect to hand jobs is to freestyle.  Add your own unique touch to give your partner a signature handie.  The best part of all is that if your grip matches your partner’s desired stimulation, you can’t mess up a hand job.

So get a fist full and happy stroking!

I love to be pampered, so when offered the chance to review Intimate Organics Sensual Cocoa Bean and Goji Berry Body Souffle, I was really excited.  I have been lucky enough to try a couple of their other products in the last year and am a big fan of the line.

This is the kind of product you can use every day or save for special nights.  I’ve been applying it after showers for a couple of weeks now and have to say that I love the way it makes my skin feel.  It’s not as quite as thick as I expected, but it leaves my skin feeling silky and goes on quick.  I will admit that I’m not a huge fan of the scent, but that’s a personal thing and it wears off before I’ve had a chance to dry my hair.

We’ve also used it for a quick massage at the end of a long day and it works pretty well.  If you’re looking for a massage oil, Intimate Organics sells those too, but the body souffle rubs in quickly and won’t leave your skin feeling oily or sticky.  It’s a nice way to get a little hands on time with your lover at the end of the day when you’re too tired for a thirty minute rub down!

My only real question is if this is an organic product, or product made with organic extracts and other non-organic ingredients.  I’ve spent time checking out their website, but I am kind of thinking it’s the latter.

Overall, this is a good product that I would recommend.  With a blend of certified organic extracts, olive oil, shea butter, mango butter, and the antioxidants goji berry and cocoa bean, it stands out when compared to most of the lotions I’ve used in the past.

For those of you who are interested in seeing what else this company has to offer, check out our full line of Intimate Organics products!

While talking about Toy Cleaners isn’t as nearly as fun or sexy as discussing the hottest dildos out there, it’s pretty important. It’s really important to take care of your toys for a couple of reasons. First, you want to get the most out of your investment – cleaning your toys is a big part of proper maintenance. Secondly, and most importantly, a dirty toy is one that spreads all sorts of germs and bacteria and that’s not good for anyone.

I love Pjur Lube, so when I saw that they made toy cleaning wipes I had to check them out. They’re really convenient and work really well, but since I’m trying to keep an eye out on my carbon footprint, I only use these for travel.  They’re a lot more convenient when you’re on the road, especially with the restrictions on liquids if you’re flying.  When I’m at home, I use a bottle of their Spray Cleaner.

For gentle, hygienic, personal cleaning Pjur Med Clean Spray Lotion and Moist Towelettes are safe for use on all skin types, sensitive or irritated.

And safe for application on alcohol sensitive materials such as latex, rubber and silicone. Simply apply directly onto the part of the skin or object to be cleaned and wipe. Available in a disinfecting spray and a sanitizing wipe. Pjur Med Clean hygiene aids work as a guard against the spread of infection and disease having an intensive antimicrobial effect against bacteria, fungal infections, and viruses such as Hepatitis B and HIV (*Pjur Med Clean has an anti-viral effect against lipophilic enveloped viruses).

Pjur Med Clean is intended for topical use exclusively and should not replace the use of condoms. Dermatologist tested. Neutral to taste and smell. Alcohol free.

Another product that I have used is Climax Bursts Toy Cleaner, and while I prefer Pjur, this is a good product that’s a little more affordable if you’re looking to save a few bucks. Honestly, the reason I like Pjur is because I think the spray bottle is more convenient, but there’s nothing wrong with this stuff. The gel formula also helps to make sure you don’t end with it every where!

Toy Cleaners are a great way to make sure you keep all of your favorite toys in great shape. I especially love them for vibrators, because I’m always nervous about electronics and water. With one of these convenient products, there’s no chance of water getting anywhere it shouldn’t be and ruining my buzz!

Be sure to check out all of the Toy Cleaners available on Sextoys.com.

Fall is quickly turning into winter and I say it’s time to heat things up in the bedroom before you fall victim to flannel pajamas for weeks at a time! One of the best ways to warm up is lots of naked time under the covers and if you’re looking for some additional heat, why not throw in some warming lube!

My new favorite is easily System JO’s H20 Warming lubricant. Besides being totally affordable, it works really well. Friction causes it to warm up, but not so much that you start to panic in fear of our genitals catching fire! It’s a really great sensation that adds to your pleasure instead of overwhelming your senses. I also love that it’s glycerin free and clean up is super easy. If you’re a fan of silicone lubricants, you’ll be excited to know that System JO also makes a Silicone Warming Lube.

Water Based Lubricant has all the benefits of System JO Personal Lubricant. Similar in feel and viscosity, yet contains NO OIL, WAX or SILICONE and washes off easily with water.

Silky, smooth feeling, never sticky or tacky. Lasts long, but washes off easy. 100% latex safe and manufactured under strict US FDA guidelines.

Another product I can recommend is Hot Pink, which is made specifically for women!

Hot Pink is a patented, exothermic lubricant that will heat up the bedroom or any other place you can dream up. Slick, non-drying formula is silicone and glycerin-free. Unlimited in use, it can incite foreplay or calm and soothe sensual massage, yet tingle every sensation. The multi-purpose ingredients make it fun, easy to clean and safe for all toys and accessories. Add a little heat to your romance with HOT PINK.

Just because it’s cold outside, doesn’t mean things have to cool off in the bedroom! Be sure to check out our full line of warming lubes to find exactly what you’re looking for.

In a previous post, we outlined the problem of Delayed Ejaculation.  Lately, a number of people have asked questions related to this problem.  I’ll take a moment to outline it again.  Delayed Ejaculation is the opposite of premature ejaculation.  Where a man who suffers from premature ejaculation will last seconds or minutes, delayed ejaculation can make a man almost, if not completely, incapable of having an orgasm during sex.

We’ll start with our primary warning on every sexual health issue.  If you have a problem with sexual dysfunction, always first seek the help of a licensed clinical professional to rule out medical, psychological or emotional issue that might be affecting your sexual health.  Sometimes, a doctor can identify an easily treatable problem, or a more serious condition that needs attention.  Relying solely on advice from the internet (even ours, though we take pride in providing good, well researched information) can be dangerous for your health and well being.  See a doctor first if you have any physical problems.

Use Lubricant

Once you’ve ruled out medical problems, you can move on to some simple tips that my help you solve this problem.

First, consider your masturbation habits.  Are you a tight-fisted jack rabbit style masturbator?  This can easily lead to delayed ejaculation.  By keeping a tight grip during masturbation, you actually create a situation where your penis is over-stimulated.  When you have sex with a partner, her or his body can’t replicate that sensation, whether with the mouth, the vagina or anus.

Solution: Try to moderate, or even stop masturbation for an extended period of time.  When you begin to masturbate again, use lubricant and a light touch while you masturbate.  This will allow your penis to become sensitive to the touch again, and take away the over-stimulation problem that makes it difficult to reach orgasm.

The first few times, don’t even focus on the orgasm.  Take a sexually appealing thought and focus on it.  Set aside a block of time and casually masturbate.  If you don’t achieve orgasm, don’t worry.  As you continue to practice, the sexual energy will build and you’ll get the desired result.

Speaking of sexually appealing thoughts, what do you think about when you’re engaging in sexual intercourse?  Is your mind on the big game, or tomorrow’s work schedule, or the need to rake the leaves?  If you think too much, you can absolutely ruin the moment when you’re having sex.

Solution: First, focus on your partner.  You want to have sex with her or him for a reason, right?  What is it that is lighting your candle?  Focus on that and that alone.  The leaves can get raked later.  Next, try extensive foreplay.  Touching, kissing, spanking – as an example of whatever turns you both on – for an extended period builds sexual energy.  On that note, you could even offer your partner an erotic massage.  Run your hands over all of that luscious real estate and enjoy the view and feel.  You’ll find your sexual tension builds more and even to the point where you can’t not be totally in the moment.  And a pleasant side effect is that if you are focusing on your partner’s pleasure, you’re absolutely certain to have a pleasurable experience, orgasm or no, and you’ll be really popular around the house for a few days.

And here’s one final thing to consider: Are you nervous, worried, or freaking out about your performance during sex?

Solution: Let it go, man.  Your partner, unless you’ve done something illegal, has chosen to enjoy sex with you.  That means your partner is as into you as vice versa.  Just focus on having a good time.  If you do that, your stud points will accumulate and you’ll be just fine.  Talk to your partner and spill the beans.  “Honey/dude, I’m really freaking out about my performance and I’m worried you aren’t into it.  Do you enjoy our sex?  Anything I can do to improve it?  I want to have a good time and not be worried that you aren’t.”  Lead with that in a casual conversation and see what happens.  Odds are, you’re going to get a hug, smile, honest discussion and hopefully much, much more for your sincerity and concern.

Give these ideas a whirl and see what happens.  You may discover that your orgasm problems will gradually become a worry of the past, and your partner will really enjoy your physical company.