Here’s our contribution to this week’s giant “Duh” file.  Holidays can wreak havoc on our sex lives.  Why, you may ask, would a group of people getting ready to indulge in the industry’s coolest office holiday party (we aren’t kidding, our company throws a holiday shindig so cool that if people knew about it, they’d forget trying to crash State dinners at the White House and try to crash our holiday party), be thinking about how their sex lives could be affected?  Easy.  We know that the holiday party is the precursor to the Holiday rush, even for people who devote their time to the best sex toys for couples on earth.

After our party tonight, many of us will be rushing to prepare for family visitors, or to go visit the family.  There will be enough jet lag to keep the sleep medicine companies in business for a while.  Kids will be running amok around us. Grandparents will be pining for the old days. Dogs will take a giant whiz on the old Christmas tree. Uncle Joe will be forced to smoke outside after setting off the fire alarm in the bathroom. All manner of other problems will crop up, not least of which is cooking a dinner for our families and what will seem like several thousand of our closest friends.

To summarize, Après ce soir, le déluge.

For a private moment

And let’s be blunt, a house full of people – even for the most open minded among us – is just not conducive to knocking boots with verve. It’s a stressful time of the year in terms of sex, and if you’re among the lucky who have a healthy and active sexual lifestyle, it can be downright unnerving.  But there are ways to get around the problem, and still keep the old libido satisfied.

Let’s start with those of us flying solo for the holidays this year.  It could be that this isn’t the right time to bring your partner home to meet the family, or whatever other reason.  But you’re in that stage of your relationship where it’s sex, shower, sex, shower again, breakfast, go to work, sex, lunch, shower, go back to work, sex, dinner, sex, sex, sex, sex, shower, go to bed, repeat. It’s a little hard to hit the off button when you’re in that really cool groove.

And now you’re home with the family and you’re still feeling the urges.  We get it.  All of us have been in a similar situation at one time or another.  In fact, that’s why humans invented the shower.  It wasn’t for hygiene, it was to provide a place to wank when the rest of the clan showed up after the annual mammoth hunt.  So there you have it, wank in the shower.  Women can use a discreet vibrator like the White Nights Waterproof Pocket Rocket, and men can freestyle under the water jets with a good masturbator like the Classix Silicone Snatch.

Good for everyone involved

Granted, that’s nothing like the real thing, but as soon as we can figure out how to miniaturize your partner to hide in your overnight bag with a button to restore them to real size when you need them, we’ll be getting a patent and selling “Partner in a Bag” kits.  We already have the miniaturizing down, we’re just trying to get the poor guy back to full size and, boy, is he angry.

For the couples, especially those of you hosting family, you’re really going to have to work together to get through this without putting out the fires.  Guys, pitch in with half the work.  There’s a ton of cleaning to be done – even more if kids are involved – and the breakfasts, lunches and dinners don’t miraculously appear on the tables.  Do everything you can to help.  Ladies, take it easy a little.  Everything doesn’t have to be perfect.  And make sure both of you are showing each other appreciation for the teamwork.

And this would be a great time to go back to our Guy’s Holiday Buying Guide.  This time of year, if ever there was a perfect time, is the time of year to break out the stress fighters.  After everyone’s tucked in, and before you’re tuckered out, break out the massage oil and trade good massages.

And a little cuddling in a nice warm bed is a good way to spend some sensual time together without waking the house.  Of course it could lead to more, but don’t blame us if after the buildup, the moment is spoiled by a fire alarm set off by Uncle Joe trying to sneak a midnight smoke in the bathroom!

Keep your love life simple during the holidays and don’t expect the grand romps you’ve grown accustomed to during the rest of the year.  And if you’re a couple who has the house to themselves this year, you’re duty bound to pick up the slack for everyone dealing with an Uncle Joe.  Try out the Honeymoon Carry On Bag and have a blast!

Happy holidays and safe travels, and keep the fires burning for the New Year!

Nothing says Happy Holidays like a sexy gift for a loved one and we’ve recently updated our Featured Products for Couples category to help you pick out the perfect present.  Today I’m highlighting a few hot items that will make sure 2010 is a good year!

First up is this super fancy soy candle that’s sure to set the mood for all sorts of fun in the future.  Soy is a renewable resource, so it’s a great gift for your green girl or boy.  Plus it burns a lot cleaner than a typical parafin candle.  We selected the Cinnamon Bun scented candle to feature, but there are plenty of options if you have something against delicious breakfast treats!

The 14-ounce Ceduxion 100% soy candle comes in a frosted glass jar and smells delightful.

Light the candle and once the wax has melted it can be dripped over your lover and used as sensuous massage oil. Seducing all your senses!

Next up, we’ve got a gorgeous Silk Binding Sash from the amazing folks at Liberator.  I can’t think of a better gift to unwrap than my girl all done up in this beautiful ribbon!  You could even tie up your partner and then engage in a little wax play with the Ceduxion Candle I just talked about.

Slippery and cool, silk ties are a striking choice for simple bindings, like wrists together, ankles bound or wrist-to-thigh.

However, in more ornate configurations, like full-body harnesses and decorative arm bindings, silk sashes become a vivid web adorning the torso with intricate patterns and loops, like a delicate lace.

Of course, we’ve got a ton of great gift ideas if neither of these float your boat. Personally, I’m hoping Santa will bring us a Liberator Esse!

OK, boys, it’s time to think about that Christmas gift.  And if you’re lucky enough to have someone naughty in your life, you’re thinking what I’m thinking, mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, sex toys for couples.  That’s right, this is the perfect season to put a little extra hot sauce in the relationship stew.  Well, first, take your finger off the mouse, and don’t click the button to complete your purchase.  That’s right, we have to put those thinking caps on for just a few minutes.

Click this picture for a good idea

Now, for our less experienced brethren, we need to spell some things out.  Trust me boys, reading this is going to spare you an awkward stare in the best case scenario, or a “What were you thinking?” question in the worst case scenario.  Here’s a little tip from your friendly testosterone based sex toy expert: What we find incredibly hot, may not always be what women find incredibly hot.

Maybe a good idea or maybe not

Take that dildo you were staring at a few minutes ago.  You might have been thinking “Wow, she’ll love this!”  That may be true, but are you willing to risk your studliness rating on it?  Think it through with me now.  If you know her sexual appetites like the back of your hand (you lucky devil), you may be perfectly alright buying that dildo.  And that’s good.  But why would you settle for good when you can have the best?

That’s right.  This year, you’re going to enhance your sex life with the tools that our spies have identified as THE most effective tools in the war against boring sex, and give her a holiday gift she’ll love.  Boring sex is perhaps the toughest opponent we men have battled since the beginning of history.  You think Genghis Khan was tough? Puh-lease.  The Mongol hordes were cupcakes compared to, “If you insist, but I really have a headache.”  You can kill a horse mounted archer.  “I’m not in the mood” is an ethereal vapor that can only be temporarily dispelled.

And boring sex has some powerful allies.  Stress, moods, misunderstandings, thoughtlessness, anger and hurrying all give boring sex their complete endorsement and support.  To fight boring sex, you must defeat this great evil’s allies.

Misunderstandings, thoughtlessness and anger can all be easily defeated.  Try being nicer.  Put your partner first sometimes.  Listen (yeah, I know, that’s one of the hard ones, but if you try it, you may actually learn something too).  Here’s a thought, make your partner dinner (or buy a really nice bring home one if you really can’t cook – learn to cook) and have it waiting for her for when she gets home from work.  Around the high-strung holidays, this is an excellent idea.

You serve it up and sit and enjoy it with her, listening to how her day went.  That’s only a first step, but you’ll be on your way. And watch her facial expression as you pay attention to what’s on HER mind, not yours.  Trust me boys, this one is a winning strategy for not just sex, but for everything.

Give her a stress reliever

Stress is an evil ally of boring sex that really takes an effort to dispel.  Try cleaning the house some, doing things that irritate her less, and doing things for her that really make her uncomfortable to do herself.  PAY ATTENTION MEN, HERE COME SOME SERIOUS TOOLS.

The next step to defeating stress is to provide an environment for her where she can totally relax.  The warriors among us know exactly how good a hot tub can feel after a hard workout or practice.  Give her the holiday gift of a luxuriant bath, and you’ll deal stress a wicked blow.  Watch her go from cranky to cozy as the hot bath filled with Kama Sutra’s Treasures of the Sea pampers her.  She’ll let that stress melt into the sea blue bath and be feeling better in short order.

Some of the young bucks among us are now asking “What does this have to do with me getting laid?”  Settle down and read on, boys, you may learn something.

Next on the holiday list to kill off some stress is a great massage.  Our spies report that nothing on earth is better for relieving stress than a good massage where it counts.  Is your partner on her feet all day?  A good foot massage is a perfect way to show her you appreciate her.  Does she have a high stress office job that keeps her under pressure?  Neck and shoulder massages, coupled with a good back massage can release all of that stress if you take your time and do it right.  Get a good massage oil and give her the attention she needs (and most likely really wants if you aren’t doing this already).

You can add to all of the relaxation with some aromatics as well.  A good candle is an excellent choice to accompany the hot bath.  The Ocean breeze scented candle would match nicely with the Treasures of the Sea. It’s all about the moment, boys.  If she can relax and enjoy the moment, stress will flow right out of her and you’ll be Mr. Hero in that moment.  Want some real fun?  Get a candle that produces massage oil like the 3 in 1 Yule Love It, which is a perfect choice for the holidays!

Everything you can do to relieve and reduce stress is one more point scored against boring sex.  Where were we on the list?  Right, moods and hurrying are left.  Here’s the thing, sometimes everyone involved wants a quickie, and there’s nothing wrong with that.  No better way to start the day than with a nice orgasm all around.

But quickies are just that, a quick moment of pleasure.  If you want the mind bending, knee rattling orgasm, you’re going to need time and the right mood.  Lucky for us, Sarah has done an extensive post on how to fight both of these enemies.  Now the smart among us are thinking “This sounds like an awful lot of work, and it isn’t what I would’ve thought, so it must be right!”  The idiots will buy a random sex toy and say “Hey honey, let’s get down for Christmas.”

Boys, invest in the gifts above this holiday season and you’ll win.  Trust me.  Focus on her, relieve stress, show some serious affection and the boring sex won’t even try to make an appearance again before Valentine’s Day, which is another great opportunity to shower her with more happiness.

Good luck, man up, and get shopping.

Only three weeks stand between you and another New Year.  And we at the Sextoys.com Partyology Department know what that means.  Another January 1st with a bad headache, a realization that at least half of your resolutions were broken before you got in the cab to go home, a dry mouth and a sincere desire to remember what happened between 2 and 5 AM.  We’re here to tell you that this year it can be different.

Time to get ready for the New Year

If you’re willing to put the time, effort and thought into a different sort of New Year, we’re willing to give you the tools!  It all starts with the party.  Sure, go have a toast with your friends.  Enjoy the company and wish everyone well.  But before you go, sit down with your partner and make a list of sexual resolutions.  We’re pretty sure that when midnight rolls around, you and your partner will have plenty of reasons to get home as soon as possible.

Here’s a helpful list of suggestions:

Resolution 1: We will start our sexual New Year as soon as possible! 1 AM sounds about right.  We’ll have to get home fast to make it!

Resolution 2: We’re going to try new things this year together.  Oh, we think you have a good idea of new things you want to try.  Sit down and do a bargaining session (I’ll let you use that Strap On if you promise to try the deep throat mints and give it a go!). Ya might want to do this bargaining a little before (like now), since it’s hard to find strap ons and deep throat mints at 1AM on January 1st.

Resolution 3: I’m going to find a different stimulus to get an orgasm.  Oh dear, this could take some time and experimenting.  On the other hand, WOO HOO, it’s going to take time and experimenting!  Heck, let’s make our entire body a playground.  Let’s try some anal play, nipple stimulation, different massages and anything else we can think to tinker with!

Resolution 4: I’m going to turn my play time into something really fun.  Try some games together, maybe fun sex dice, or strip poker, or, well, use your imagination!  You’ll figure out ways to laugh and make love in a whole new way!

Resolution 5: We are going to do this more often.  Do we need to explain this one?

Make your own resolutions and stick to them.  And always remember that the Sextoys.com Partyology Department is here to help you stay on track to a great sex life!

The weather is turning cold and it’s the perfect time of year to curl up under some blankets with your lover and some hot lesbian porn!  I’m a huge fan myself, so I’m pretty excited to share a few movies that have been released recently that I really love.   Here are a few of the titles that any fan of girl on girl action would love to own.

First up is Sweetheart Video’s Lesbian Mentors Older Women Younger Girls. Sweetheart is a relatively new studio started by Nica Noelle (formerly known as Sydni Ellis of Girlfriend Films) that has everyone talking with their seductive sapphic films. I really love Ariel X – and let me just say she’s amazing in this one.

Sometimes our desires can be scary, and it helps to have a mentor to show us the way. In this older/younger-theme film from Sweetheart Video, young, curious lesbians and the beautiful older women they desire meet for explosive sexual encounters.

Shayla Laveaux shows young Tera Dice why sapphic love is the best choice, while Michelle Lay helps Mina Meow unleash her inner lesbian.

Nicole Moore gives in to the lustful longings of young roommate Sinn Sage, and Nina Hartley administers some tough love to rebellious Ariel X.

If you’re a fan of the golden age of porn, you’re not going to want to miss this new release starring two of the biggest stars of classic porn – Nina Hartley and Ginger Lynn. When Ginger Met Nina from Triangle Films, pairs these two superstars for the first time ever and the results can’t be described with mere words.

It’s been 25 years in the making, Ginger Lynn and Nina Hartley together at last!

You won’t want to miss this ADRENALIN DRIVEN ELECTRIFYING SCENE! Their untamed passion brings them to a point of no return as they send each other through a rollercoaster of orgasms!

My final selection is from one of the hottest amateur studios out there, Abby Winters.  If you want to see real Aussie girls getting it on, you definitely need to check out Naughty Girls.  These girls are gorgeous, all-natural and can’t get enough dripping wet pussy!

Naughty Girls Kara and Silvie exchange coy glances in the alleyway as Kara leads Silvie to her balcony for an innocent kiss or two.

It isn’t long before Kara awakens Silvie`s cheeky side. After a hard day at work, sophisticated and sweetly-spoken Anabela relaxes in her business shirt and tight pencil skirt. Little does she know Kara is ready and waiting to pounce on her for a steamy girl-on-girl romp.

Of course, if these titles aren’t exactly what you’re looking for, we’ve got hundreds of hot lesbian DVDs that you’re going to have to see to believe! If you’re in the mood for something else, be sure to take a look at all of our Porn Categories for just the right flick.